Feeling like the white rabbit

     On the drive over to therapy this morning I felt just like the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland. "We're late, were late." Is what I kept thinking, and saying to myself. I don't like to be late, so that was quite a stressful situation for me. We give ourselves an hour to get to therapy, which is usually enough time. But, today we were headed there from the chiropractors office. They were busy today and so we had to wait more than we usually do to be seen. By the time we left the chiropractor's office we would barely make it in time to our therapy appointment. I hate leaving on such a tight schedule, it doesn't give enough "wiggle" room. On our way we got stuck in bumper to bumper traffic. There was a bad car accident up ahead. It took us about ten minutes to get off on the next exit. Then another twenty minutes to get over to therapy on the street. And we just kept getting delayed over and over; getting behind a slow driver, getting caught at a red light, getting stuck behind a cement mixer,etc.. Ugh, I was getting pretty frustrated and upset. It's moments like that, that make me realize just how tired, worn out and stressed out I am; because my normal self wouldn't get so worked up about things that are out of my control. But I found myself getting frustrated, upset, nervous, mad and short tempered. I was dreading being late because I didn't want Amaya to miss out on any therapy time. And I was nervous that we wouldn't have enough time to do all the things she needs to do in a session. I worried that they would make us reschedule and cancel our appointment for today, which I really didn't want to happen since Amaya needed her knee to be re-taped. I had to take many deep breaths, and tried to tell myself that things would be okay. I tried hard to stay calm, because I don't want to model that behavior for my girls. I talked them thru my emotions and reaction. Once we go to therapy and saw Melissa I was fine.
      By the time we got to therapy Amaya had already missed half of her session. I wasn't very happy about that; I know how important her sessions are and I hated her missing any valuable time. Melissa was very understanding and told Amaya that she could work until Melissa's next patient arrived. On the drive over I had Amaya remove the old tape from her knee and then cleaned off the glue with a baby wipe, so that when we got back we didn't have to waste any of our time on that. Melissa massaged Amaya's knee, then stretched it. She had me do some stretches on Amaya's with the band while she got new tape then applied it. We only had time for Amaya to do some lunges, climb the ladder then start her bends.
     Melissa told her that since she didn't get to stretch her knee enough she could make 85-90 her goal for today. Melissa told Amaya that since time was out (her next patient was already there) that she had to work quickly and see how much she could bend in a short amount of time. Amaya's knee was at 57 degrees to start. Amaya worked hard and fast. She was focused and pushed herself. She was able to get 90 degrees in what Melissa called "record time." She said, you just set the "Olympics' of bending record." We were proud of Amaya.
     Melissa told us to make sure we do some stretches at home to make up for what we weren't able to do there today. So before bed Amaya did some with dad. The rest of the day was busy, but at a slower pace and we were able to catch our breath a bit. Yesterday our temporary disabled parking permit expired so we had to park in non-disabled spots everywhere we went. I must admit I had gotten use to the extra space, and room that they come with. Its tricky getting both girls out, and a wheelchair or walker in a tight spot. Getting back in with groceries or anything else is just as tricky, if not more. We'll see how we do, if it proves to be too difficult we might ask Dr. Nelson for another parking permit.

This is the band we used to bend her knee with. I held it and Amaya pushed against it. Its not as strong as the pink one we use at home.

Here she is climbing. She went up and down five times today. 

Sitting into a bend was tough today. Amaya could feel the stretch. 

     Later we stopped by a favorite library of ours. We looked at the animals, then explored the recycling area. Amaya pedaled the bike. The bike is set up so that when you pedal it you can turn on a light, fan and bell by the energy your body is creating. It was at a funny angle, so she couldn't reach it very well, but I made her do several pedals, so that she could bend her knee since she didn't' get to at therapy. She was able to pedal fast enough to turn on the fan, which is quite impressive.

     Later we stopped by her school for a PTA meeting. While we were there several teachers said hello and asked how she was feeling. It was nice to see so many make the effort to come talk to her. Several commented on haw amazed they were by how well she was doing, how much bone she grew and asked about how much longer for her new bone to harden and heal. I had to explain to several people that she's no longer growing new bone, but letting the new bone harden and become strong enough to support her so that the fixator can come off (that's what's supporting her leg now). Its still confusing for some people. But they were excited to know that the fixator should be off by December.

     Her knee is still sore and causing lots of pain. Its mostly at night when she has her leg locked in place.   Last night she had the same pain and interrupted sleep. Tonight she's woken up once already. I'm so tired, I have such a hard time catching up on sleep, and I can't tell you how badly I want a nap. Thanks again for your kind words, and support along the way.