Here's a recap of yesterday.
I woke up at two am with Lidie. For a half hour melt down, then again at six am. I was tired. I hoped Amaya would sleep in, but she woke up at seven thirty. Lidie realized it was surgery day and she was upset. She didn't want to go anywhere with anyone. She begged us to bring her along. She even asked to stay in the parking lot waiting for Amaya. "Please, mom! I don't care how long! I'll wait for her." It was heartbreaking. Surgery days are just as tough for the siblings, if not more. We tried to keep Lidie distracted, entertained and calm.
While we waited for our check in time Amaya saw a commercial for a trampoline bounce play place. She got so excited and said she couldn't wait to be able to go. She started to realize just how pain free she would be once the rod came out. Josh had asked her if she thought she'd be able to feel the difference when the rod was out. Very confidently she said yes. Its been such a bother for her these past few months.
Amaya had six ounces of apple juice two hours before our check in time. The surgery center called us and let us know Dr. Nelson was running ahead of schedule and asked if we wanted to come in early. But since Amaya had finished her juice not too long ago they told us to stick to our original time.
As we loaded up to leave Amaya told Lidie, "I'm sad for you." Lidie responded with, "I'm more sad for you." It was sweet to see these girls who can sometimes drive each other crazy with their sibling rivalry be empathetic to one another. We went to drop off Lidie at her grandparents house, but when we got there she didn't want to get out of the car. Dad carried her out, car seat and all. that seemed to lighten the mod for her, but only added to my concern for her. For four years old she had to show a great deal of strength, courage and bravery. My heart ached for her all day. Before I left I make sure to kiss her palm (like in the Kissing Hand) which helped comfort her and I both.
On the drive down Amaya kept telling us how hungry she was. Josh hadn't eaten anything either to show her some support and solidarity. I had only eaten at 6:30 some cream of wheat with Lidie and was getting thirsty and hungry too. As we drove Josh told me that he was feeling calm. He said knowing Dr. Nelson would be in charge today gave him confidence. Confidence in your doctor is huge! Amaya played with an iPad on the drive down and kept herself pretty distracted. Occasionally she'd look up and ask, "are we there, yet?"
When we approached the surgery center I felt calm and comforted. Knowing we had the help and support of so many family and friends and that we had Dr. Nelson looking out for Amaya soothed my soul. It was kind of strange to be so calm at that moment. I'm usually full of butterflies in my stomach. But, not that time.
Amaya was calm as we checked in, registered, filled out paper work, and had her vitals taken. She started to get a bit nervous when they attached the round tape things that they use to measure her heart during surgery. They usually attach those after shes asleep and she doesn't see it, so she was a bit thrown off. As the nurse left Amaya changed into her gown. She may or may not have stood on the bed. And she may of may not have jumped up on the bed once. But, only by dads suggestion. After she was dressed she said, "I feel awkward." We weren't sure what she meant by that. We waited over an hour for the surgery to start. While we did she played on the iPad, played with us, and talked. She did great! She was calm and kind.
We met with the resident first. He looked at her hip and said he could feel the rod. He said that since it was so predominant it might only take about five minutes to remove the rod. He said it would be about an hour for the whole procedure. We signed release forms and then he wrote on her leg. After he left Amaya got a bit more nervous. "I feel icky. My left side and arm feel weird." She said. At almost one o'clock we were still waiting for the anesthesiologist. We were hungry! I rubbed Amaya's feet and tried to stay calm. I worried about her femur. What if the femur cracked when the rod was removed? What if there was a complication? And worse off what if the femur brakes and we lose some of the lengthening we gained? I worried for Lidie and Amaya both at the same time.
After waiting for almost a couple hours things started to go quickly. Almost a little too quickly. The anesthesiologist came and talked to Amaya. She talked her through what would happen. Then a nurse came to talk to us. Then Dr. Nelson came over to talk to us too. He was kind and reassured Amaya that things would be fine. He asked Amaya about her summer. We asked if she could keep the rod. He smiled and said sure. The nurse asked what Amaya would do with it. "Add it to her collection." I said. Amaya told her she already had a fixator at home. Dr. Nelson smiled then gave me a hug then left. His hug comforted me because I know he cares for Amaya and would take good care of her. Quickly another anesthesiologist came and told us it was time for "hugs and kisses." I kissed Amaya, told her I loved her and would be waiting for her. As they wheeled her away, she turned back with teary eyes. Ugh, my heart broke. Seriously, that pain is only equal to a broken heart, or when you hear someone you know has died. The moment they wheel her away is always hard for Josh and I. But this time, since she did look back, and had pain in her eyes. I had a hard time recovering. I knew she left pain and fear. And I was powerless to do anything. Last night before bed she told us how scared and confused she was. Usually she drinks some "pink stuff" to help her forget and calm down. But I think since it was such a short surgery they didn't give it to her. Walking out ot the waiting area was hard. I had to stop in a hall first to cry and pull my self together.
We waited for forty-six minutes but it felt much longer. Time passes strangely when you're waiting for a surgery to be over. I had no clue what time it was. I knew Amaya would be fine, was in good hands and had kind souls looking after her, but it was still hard to wait. At two o'clock I was tired, hungry and exhausted emotionally and mentally. Its exhausting worrying about both girls. When they called us to go back into recovery Amaya was very emotional. She was confused and sad. The first thing she said ti me was " I love you mom." She said she felt like she was in a dream, that she was worried about us. We tried to calm her and soother her. She was sore. As soon as she drank some juice the nurse was able to give her some more pain medication. Dr. Nelson came in to check in on her. He said she did great. I asked about the femur and he said its just like the right one. That was great news! He left to give her time to recover.
Amaya started to be more like herself within a few minutes. She drank juice, had a Popsicle, and some bites of a saltine. She continued to tell us how much she loved us and missed us. It was so sweet. I just wanted to pick her up. She asked to look at her hip, and when we showed it to her she was pleasantly surprised to see a small piece of gauze. Once she got her pain medications eh started ot feel better. She continued to be sweet and polite to the nurse the entire time, even when she wasn't feeling well. After a few minutes the nurse said that if shes feeling good she can be released in half an hour. I was surprised how quickly she recovered from the anesthesia and was able to go home. She had no problem getting dressed or hopping ot her wheelchair, with the nurses help. We had a very kind nurse named Kim. Her mom and I work together. It was nice having someone who knew of us be prepared to help us.
Before we left the female resident came in with some flowers and a card from Dr. Nelson. Wow! What a sweet gift. This is the end of a phase of our journey with him. One that has left Amaya with a stable knee, hip, and two feet firmly planted on the ground! We've been so fortunate to have Dr. Nelson leading our way. He's been amazing. Seriously, amazing! We get a couple years off from surgeries then we'll be working with him again to lengthen her femur the rest of the way. The resident was kind and encouraged Amaya to continue with her dream to be a surgeon. She told her there aren't many girl doctors out there, so to never give up.
We hit some traffic on the way home so it took us a little over an hour to get home. The last few minutes Amaya was very ready to be home! She got comfy on the couch with her pillow pet her friend Caelan gave her. Later she had some cake her Tia Lacy and Grammy brought her. She was asleep by nine pm and I followed shortly there after. Our long draining day came to an end.
We've made it thorough four surgeries in three years time. We've survived! Amaya is very lucky to have a wonderful doctor, loving family and friends by her side. Thank you all.
Carrying Lidie into her grandparents house.
Me and Amaya in the lobby.
Getting her pulse read, and blood pressure taken. She started to get a little nervous here.
Having her heart checked.
Waiting with Teddy. She got to take him into the surgery room with her yesterday.
That was kind of cool.
Her face after beating me at tic tac toe again.
Waiting with dad.
Amaya and dad holding hands.
The leg is marked and ready to go.
Amaya smelling her mask. The anesthesiologist made it smell like bubble gum for her.
A screen shot of my phone the second they called us back to see Amaya. You should see us move when they call us back! We move so quickly.
Our first look at her. Aww. Her eyes were so red and puffy from all the crying she was doing.
The first look at her rod.
Heading home!
Lidie checking out Amaya's leg.
Some of Amaya's goodies.
Here's what her hip looks like. The bruise kind of scared her until I showed her the picture and she noticed how "small it is."She can't get it wet if for five days. She's happy because that means no showers or baths. Then after that the bandage will start to come off. She had that clear tape stuff with her knee surgery too.
Here's a look at the rod. It's next to a ruler and measures twelve inches.
Amaya's flowers and card from Dr. Nelson. She was pleasantly surprised to see them. So were we.
First attempt at walking just a half hour after getting home.
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